A Love Letter to My Blog

My darling Blog,

Thank you for being so patient with me. I’ve missed you.

I know I haven’t come around in a while. Life has just been so…complicated.

Lots of extra hours at work. Family members needing to be moved to new houses or going into the hospital.

And then on top of all that, I’m dealing with some Stuff that has come up recently. Lots of impatience about what feels like lack of progress. Unmet expectations. Struggling with how to stay connected when being busy at work makes me feel really isolated.

It’s all left me with a serious case of the Blahs. The numb out in front of the TV kind of blahs.

I know it sounds like a bunch of excuses, but it’s not you. It’s me. Really.

The good news is that I’m working on it. I’ve been talking to blocks, thanks to Havi. Maybe I’ll tell you more about that soon. But just know that it’s been enlightening. And it was enough to get me back here to write this letter to you, after a whole month away.

I promise I’ll try not to let it go so long in the future.

Forgive me?

Love,

Victoria

8 thoughts on “A Love Letter to My Blog

  1. Debra

    Dear Victoria,

    I am here for you. I will never judge you, criticize your content, writing style, flow…remember, I was created out of your love and desire to express yourself.

    When you need space; I honor that.

    When all you can muster the energy for after all the ‘stuff’ of life is done for the moment is a few moments in front of the TV; I support you.

    I believe in you, for I am you.

    I trust your nature. I trust the ‘who you are’ who has not left/gone away/gone astray…the ‘who you are’ who just needed to take a break.

    Just know that I am always here for you. Know that when you feel inspired, as you did today, that I am here in a heartbeat to lovingly and beautifully display your soulful musings.

    The beauty of our relationship is that it is guided by you, your desires/intents/needs…I am yours unconditionally.

    If I could give you a hug, I would. In fact…I am, I’m giving you one right now… {{{HUG}}} Can you feel it? :0)

    Please Victoria, forgive yourself. All is well. I love you. I am here for you.

    With adoration and infinite support,
    Your Darling Blog

    (@debsoul helped a little with this transmission; her heart goes out to you…she’s walked a mile *or so* in your shoes.)

    Debra’s last blog post..Barometer Check ~ What’s the Vibe?

    1. Victoria

      @Camellia – After what you’ve been through, it’s no wonder you had to numb out for a while. On the bright side, if you can come here and remind me that “This too shall pass,” then you are well on your way to taking this turmoil-inducing situation in stride. I’m not sure I would be taking it as well as you. I hope things turn around for you quickly. Sending peaceful vibes and strength your way.

  2. Eileen

    Oh man, I sooooo hear you on the “numb out in front of the TV kind of blahs”!!

    Didn’t someone very smart (Ok *Havi*) once say that consciously choosing to zone out in front of the TV is at least something? Yeah, I like that. So that’s where you are now and I’m sure your blog forgives you ;)

    Anyway, I personally just decided to wipe February 2009 off the calendar, for purposes of my own blog. Maybe you’ll join me, and my magic calendar, and then there won’t be any need to seek forgiveness for *anything* ;)

    We’ll all be here when you feel like writing again. Smooches!!

    Eileen’s last blog post..How I re-wrote a destructive pattern in four long-and-painful steps (Part 1 of 2)

  3. Victoria

    @Eileen You are absolutely right – Havi *did* say that – thanks for reminding me! Will definitely remember it the next time the TV calls my name. And I absolutely will join you in skipping February when it comes to blogging. That is actually a really splendid idea.

    And as @debsoul channeled earlier, my blog is me, so by asking it for forgiveness, I’m apparently feeling the need to ask myself forgiveness. So let’s just settle that now, shall we?

    Self? I forgive you – er – me. To which I reply, “No forgiveness necessary.”

  4. Camellia

    Hi! Just discoverd your blog and have been enjoying reading past entries.

    I know about the stuff that makes you veg in front of the TV. Last week I was laid off. From a contract that was supposed to last through 2009 and probably beyond. From a location 300 miles from home. Where I was told to look for permanent housing because this was a long term contract, so I signed a year’s lease and moved Lionheart and the family pets here to join me. From a large business in a small town surrounded by nothing – the large cities (and closest other employers) are 3 hours away in any direction. From a project unexpectedly cancelled by the new CEO. Gotta make your mark in the first 100 days, I suppose.

    Needless to say, my mind was reeling and my emotions were in turmoil. TV, specifically QVC, allowed me to veg by watching beautiful things being paraded across the screen, accompanied by those soothing voices. Almost like a meditation. Finally today I feel functional enough to update my resume and start the process of finding another job.

    Hang in there; ‘this too shall pass’.

    Camellia’s last blog post..Lesson NOT learned, I guess.

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